Potty Training Problem — Refusing to Poop.

You wait and wait and wait — but it's a no-go. Here's what to do when your toddler has trouble pooping in the potty.

What it is: Your child has already shown that he can go with the flow by peeing in the potty. But with number two, it’s a whole different story.

Why this potty training problem happens: Sometimes it’s a matter of control — the more you push him to poop, the more your tot enjoys his power to hold it in. Fear might also be a factor — some kids have trouble pooping because they’re afraid their tush will fall in the toilet. Others have a fear of flushing or are bothered by the idea of losing a part of themselves when the poop disappears down the bowl.

What you need to know when your toddler has trouble pooping: This potty training problem can test a parent’s patience like none of the other developmental milestones — but have faith. Sooner (before age two) or later (after age three), all children cross that finish line. Until then, it’s important to remember that potty-training is not a race. Let your toddler set the pace and if he’d rather stroll than sprint, don’t take it personally.

What to do when your toddler has trouble pooping:

• Take a break. Tell your child that when he’s ready, he can try making a BM in the potty again and that you’ll be there to help. Then lay off the topic, and let him feel like he’s in the driver’s seat. Above all, never force a toddler who has trouble pooping on the potty to sit there when he doesn’t want to. It’ll not only make him more resistant (and scared, if his fears are holding him back), it can also lead to constipation.
  
• Help him feel secure. If your tot is having trouble pooping because he’s afraid of falling in, make sure the potty seat fits your toilet well and isn’t shaky. The same goes for the step stool, which should be steady as a rock. Or offer your child the option of using a potty chair (pick one with a sturdy base that won’t tip over when he gets up).
  
• Hold off on flushing. If the sound of rushing water spooks your sweetie so much that he has trouble pooping, wait until he’s out of the room before flushing. As he becomes more comfortable with the noise, gradually close the distance — he can stand in the next room, the hallway, the doorway, and so on. Then, when he’s ready, ask him if he wants to push down on the lever himself.
  
• Say good-bye. If your tot seems anxious when he catches sight of his toddler poop swirling down the drain, encourage him to wave bye-bye to it before flushing. It can make him feel better about the separation. Another solution to this potty training problem — do some test runs with toilet paper only. Be matter-of-fact (but clear about what’s flushable) when you do the deed, though. Otherwise, your little one may think it’s fun to flush down his toys, your keys, or the sitter’s cell phone.
  
• Motivate with a treat. Casually offer an incentive — a sticker on a chart for every successful sitting, say. After a certain number of stickers, your little one can cash them in for a prize (ice cream with Daddy or a toy from the dollar store).

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